KSL

Mercury is in retrograde. That’s my current excuse for every bit of bad luck I’ve had this month.

When your life feels like it’s FALLING APART… Hopefully you’re being more dramatic than you have to be, like me, and things aren’t really that bad. I mean, if you’re reading this blog on a phone or laptop, I guarantee you already have plenty to be grateful for.

It’s not always the case for me, but lately I’m attracting negative vibes that my life is breaking down. Just to name a few super inconvenient issues:

• I chipped my front tooth for the FOURTH TIME. The filling just keeps breaking off no matter how many times I’ve gotten it fixed. I feel like a hillbilly who can’t afford to maintain my medical bills or be taken seriously professionally. The joke is that I actually can’t afford all of my dental work.
• My stupid iPhone. It started breaking down when the iPhone 11 came out. First it was the microphone, but then the whole dang device just shuts down and turns off. I waited 5 days for a tiny, low-storage replacement due to company policy and it also started off broken for days with a battery issue.
• My poor laptop SHATTERED! If you know me, you know I practically live on my laptop. I carry it everywhere and have been lost without it. No V!ROC work or t-shirts have been done in weeks.
• I feel like I’ve been failing at work with some of my teams. I have a few coaches in panic mode and as their choreographer, I am feeling the blame for their stress.

I realize these problems aren’t huge to everyone, but they’re adding real (mostly financial) stress to my everyday life. I can’t ignore the issues either, because I have invested time and money into being an adult and my customer relations will make or break my career salary.

However (yes! positivity is here!), the truth of the matter is that it’s really not the end of the world. There are more good things in my life than bad and we, as humans, MUST have that balance. I’m livid after writing the first part of this blog, but this is my chance to practice gratitude for what I do have.

• I may have a chipped front tooth, but I have a boyfriend who loves me and thinks I’m beautiful regardless. He pretends that he doesn’t notice.
• Without a phone & laptop, I feel more disconnected from media and more connected with reality, even if my stress levels went up in work.
• I am grateful for a job that I genuinely love and promise to make each relationship I have with my coaches better. I offer 24/7 feedback via video at NO CHARGE for my teams and that is a perk I will continue to assist with.
• I know that I will find a way to afford the lifestyle that I dream of. I’m a b@d@$$ (for lack of a better term) for being able to handle my insane student loans & bill overhead year after year.

And honestly? Why stop there? Let’s be extra thankful for all the things in my life that aren’t broken. Gratitude for what you have will bring more into your life.

• I love our new home. I am grateful for a cozy condo with Tanner and each of our little brothers. I’m also grateful for our sense of interior design.
• I get to live in Colorado. I see mountains every day.
• I am healthy. I’m in good shape for 26 and can still throw a running full without warming up.
• I get to travel often and explore the world.
• I am spoiled in love. Happiness in your heart truly doesn’t come until you allow the love inward and fearfully love in return. My boyfriend goes above and beyond in giving me presents that help my future (like the expensive athleisure he gets for me “just because”) and making each day special (like asking me what kind of dessert I want).
• I have a future. I know that there are many adventures, travels, and laughs ahead.

If I told you I didn’t feel a little better after writing this, I’d be lying. Personally, I feel more calm and in control of my emotions when I physically write out my gratitude. My stress has gone down even though my problems are the same.

Try this next time you’re feeling low!

I hope that if your problems are easier or far more difficult than mine, you can find it in yourself to focus your energy into something more positive. Things don’t have to get worse before they get better.

-ksex

P.S. Here’s a photo of me looking like I have it all together even though my life is commonly falling apart. It’s all about your attitude! It’s also a #tbt to a trip to Grand Cayman that I was fortunate enough to be invited to. Gratitude over frustration because we choose our energy, people!!!